jet plane (part III)

if you are just tuning in, you can catch up with this story line here and here. and for those of you that have been following along, you didn't think this story was over did you?

i'm skipping way ahead, now, but i think that it is aptly timed. this portion has two pertinent events. the first is that back in may (while my momma was visiting) we found OUR HOUSE. after a year of looking exclusively in the tri-valley our eyes landed on the property that fit all of our criteria... 4 bedrooms? check. some updates? check. area that could be designated as an office/playroom? check. yard? check... we walked into the showing and couldn't find any reason to not write an offer. on paper and in person, it had everything that we were looking for. and so we told our realtor that we were ready to write an offer. we looked at comps, we looked at the listing price, we considered our budget and we wrote an offer.

and it was accepted.

scott and i were both in disbelief. could it be that our journey towards "home" was finally coming to an end? and then in the days that followed, we learned that it was not to be. while it all looked good at first glance, the inspections revealed that there were a lot of potential problems. while our flesh wanted us to walk forward, our God sense kept telling us that we were to walk away. it was a challenging moment. on the part of my husband, i feel like he wants to provide for us. i think it is fair to say that when (and if) we buy a home, it will be the culmination of that. going back to renting after years of owning feels a bit like going backwards. for me, i have felt like the moment that we buy we can finally feel "at home". i long to scrutinize chips of paint and decorate the girlies rooms. i yearn for something that is "mine" and that i can put my stamp on. but as i walked through writing an offer, examining the reports, and mentally preparing to buy a home, i kept feeling nudged by God. i constantly was reminded that nothing in this world is "mine" and that the only stamp that i need is His stamp of approval. and at the end of the day, it just didn't feel like we had that. again, just like the first offer on our home in la grange, it felt like we were trying to force something that wasn't in God's plan for us. at the end of the day, i was reminded that "home" and "mine" are of the flesh. we have been provided for- for the love of pete, we live in a rental home that we saw four pictures of on-line- and it more than meets our needs.

if we had bought that house, we would have closed on june 30th. as the day approached, i kept feeling gratitude mount in my heart. it is amazing how much it hurt to walk away from that deal and then just a short time later, how relieved i was that we did. i am thankful.

the second pertinent event is that flight we missed a year ago last may. remember that? it's funny, but after we got home we kept thinking about it. on one hand, they told us that we couldn't get on the flight because our bag wouldn't make it. according to post-911 standards, all passengers must ride with their baggage. but if you recall, our bag ended up going ahead without us on the flight we weren't on.

we called the airline when we returned to chicago to discuss this with them and see what might be done about it. immediately, we were issued a credit towards a future flight.

and that brings us to the present. tomorrow, miss e and her momma (moi) will be traveling to chicago. i get chills as i type those words. we are headed to a week filled with lots of time with amazing friends. and that is all possible because a.) we missed our flight last may on a house hunting trip to pleasanton and b.) because we didn't close on a house on june 30th.

as i prepared for this trip over the past week and packed our bags today, i was overcome with gratitude. it is amazing how in the moment we look at the details and wonder why in the world things could be going so wrong, but when we look back on an event we can see that what looked "so wrong" was part of how God was writing our story.

you see, knowing that i was going to see my bestest girls for a week in july has been such oxygen for my soul. while i am coming to love california... while i am making friends in this wonderful town... while i am being shown ways to serve the kingdom in this place... while i have learned that "home" is wherever God places my family on this side of heaven... i desperately miss my friends. i miss being known. i miss being understood. i long to hang with my girlfriends and curl up in a good conversation about nothing at all in a familiar place. and while i long for that for me, i long for that for e.

and so tonight, on the eve of my departure, i stand in awe of my maker for knowing exactly what i would need a year before i would need it. i praise Him for providing those details that would make this story unfold and am in awe at how he knows me, understand me and loves me right down to the tiniest detail.