beautiful!

 a few weeks ago, after dinner in the backyard, scott lit a fire in the chiminea and let the girls make s'mores.  we haven't used it much since moving to california, but it used to be part of our friday night routine in la grange.  we would go to palmer place for dinner and then have s'mores on the back porch. it was always so lovely to watch scott and e build a little fire and then indulge in this simple treat.  d would sit in her bouncy seat playing with her toes and i would watch from a patio chair, bursting with joy at the blessing of my life- the simple things that make life so rich.

i didn't realize it, until i was laying in the grass with my head in scott's lap watching the little girls partake in this tradition, that i had missed this routine ever so much.

it was one of those mental photograph moments where you capture the essence of the experience deep within your soul and file it away under the heading "love" in your heart.  the smell of fresh cut grass, the crackle of the fire, the melty goo of chocolate, poppy spinning around from the sugar high and blowing bubbles for scott and i to enjoy from her bubble wand, music playing softly in the background, the weight of scott's arm around me.  it is one of those moments where you just want to freeze time- push pause - and  rest in the simple offerings of life.

and then the moment ends someone cries, somebody needs something, (or in our case- a snail crawled onto scott's leg causing him to jump up and declare he needed to get out of the grass) and time moves forward and the moment comes to an abrupt finish.  but the feeling stays with you.

last night i went with my beautiful friend leslie to see francesca battiestelli in concert.  she was performing at the alameda county fair which is housed in our town.  i have loved her music since i first heard it a few years ago and we both jumped at the chance to see her perform.  it was nice to sit in the amphitheater chatting together and just allow ourselves to be in the moment of two mommas away from kiddos enjoying a night free of baths, teeth brushing and the tuck-in routine.  the concert began and both of us were taken by the scene.  there was this precious couple at very back of the arena standing in the aisle dancing to the music.  we both happened to glance towards the back as he spun her around.  it was beautiful.

there were three teenage girls standing up and dancing together to the music.  they giggled and whispered and sang along, capturing the moments on the iPhones (as i suspect is traditional for teenage girls to do).

as the concert continued i kept looking around in awe.  i don't know why, but both leslie and i were amazed by the crowd and we kept wondering about the story behind the people that were there.  i wanted to get to know the dancing couple at the back and learn about their story.  were they dating?  newly weds?  did francesca have something to do with their story and how they met?  i was intrigued.

a few songs into franny's set, i happened to glance down the row and notice a girl dressed head to toe in bright pink.  she looked to be in her 20's and she looked to have some sort of physical limitation and possibly a mental limitation- downs perhaps.  she appeared to be alone and was clutching a pink stuffed bear- won on the mid-way at the fair perhaps?  she was singing along and gently swaying to the tune.  she knew every word.

moments later francesca invited everyone to stand and she invited the crowd to sing along to a worship song...  it goes like this:

your love never fails 
it never gives up
it never runs out on me

your love never fails 
it never gives up
it never runs out on me

higher than the mountains that i face
stronger than the power of the grave
constant through the trial and the change
this one thing remains

your love never fails
it never gives up
it never runs out on me

your love never fails 
it never gives up
it never runs out on me



i looked down the row at the girl.  i glanced at the dancing couple.  i smiled at my friend.  the girl was standing and her arms that were once curled into her body were now stretched straight at her sides and she was bouncing to the beat of the drums.  the dancing couple were arm and arm swaying together worshiping God in pure delight and experiencing love.

it was beautiful and i felt that mental photograph begin to set up the frame in the viewfinder of my mind to capture the moment, but before i could hit "click" francesca transitioned into another one of her songs.  this one titled beautiful, beautiful.

now there's a joy inside i can't contain
but even perfect days end in rain
and though it's pouring down
i see you through the clouds
shining on my face

like sunlight burning at midnight
making my life something so
beautiful, beautiful
mercy reaching to save me
all that i need
you are so
beautiful, beautiful...

the girl down the row had her chin lifted towards the heavens and her arms outstretched belting out the tune.  and she was so beautiful.

a few songs later francesca and her husband took stools on center stage.  he picked up a guitar and she sang along as he strummed out a song they had worked on together.



and i melted as i took it all in.   i snapped my mental picture and filed it under the heading of "love".  God's love is beautiful- the love found in friendship, in a boy twirling a girl at the back of an amphitheater, a girl recognizing that in spite of her challenges she is truly beautiful, in a husband and wife singing a ballad together on stage...

and once again, my heart nearly burst.