exactly one year ago e, scott and i were boarding a plane in chicago to come check out pleasanton for the first time... i've been thinking about it all week and contemplating the mental state i was in last year and the mental state of the present. i've been thinking about our family and how it has changed so much and how we have grown (in number and together). it is an interesting place to be standing. and for so much of this year, i have been more of a soft blogger. as we have gone into this journey, i think i have been more private in our God story than i ever have been before.
i went back today and looked at my old blog and realized that i have never told you a single detail about our move.
i think it's time to change all of that. i should probably start with a correction. i said that it was one year ago that we were boarding a plane. but that isn't exactly how that story shook out. let me explain.
one year ago... to the day, we dropped off baby d at my friend jen's house and headed to o'hare airport. i was a bundle of nerves and excitement. we had committed to moving to pleasanton if our home sold, but we had never stepped foot in the town. there we were, about to bridge that gap for the first time. dropping off d was a bit emotional for me. it was hard to know that we were leaving her so many miles behind as we took these steps, but we knew we had too much ground to cover with a little one. we also knew that it was going to be rough on e, but realized that she was old enough to need to see this new place that was going to be home.
where was i... we headed off to the airport. and somehow traffic that should have a been a little bit bad became parking lot traffic. we tried not to worry. we are the kind of family that gets to the airport with enough time to check in, eat lunch, take a nap, browse through the book store, hike a mountain, read three books that we picked up in the bookstore and still make our flight. (ok- so if i'm honest, "we" aren't really so much as "the kind of family" that does that. the real truth is that is just how my hubby rolls and as his wife i am along for that ride. and he might take a little bit of good natured ribbing for this... or should i say, used to, before this trip.) eventually we parked the car at the airport and realized it was time for a little bit of running.
and so we hustled... to a line that was forever long and just so happened to be the wrong line. after wasting some precious minutes in that wrong line we headed to the right line... where they told us to just take our bag (which was more like the size of a u-haul truck) to the security line. and so we did only to be met by the security people who gave us a "what you talkin' 'bout, willis" kind of look and sent us back to the regular check-in. oh, and did i mention that we had already been in that line? did i mention that it was a million miles long? did i mention that e hadn't had dinner yet, because we were sort of counting on a wee bit of extra time at the airport... to nap, read books and do whatever else it is that those early airport arrivers do?
and here is where the story gets interesting.
scott and i separated. he went back to the line with the bag and i went through security with the girl... you know, to get her a proper dinner.
and it just so happens that our gate was the one that is super far. it also just so happens that our gate is the one that requires you to travel on a mile long underground people mover. somewhere between leaving scott and the gate (underground on the people mover), i looked down at my phone to get a glimpse at the time. and then this pregnant momma almost went into labor... right there on the people mover underground in o'hare airport on my way to pleasanton for the very first time! up until this point i was sort of depending on my better half to keep track of the time and i was pulling my weight by taking care of the girl (plural if you count the one in my belly that was doing a gymnastic routine at that precise moment). and so i began to run. i grabbed e by the hand (who was happily enjoying the neon lights that line the ceiling over the people mover... if you've been to o'hare you know what i'm talking about) and began to bust-a-move. we ran. at one point i picked her up and ran with her in my arms. i was like a track star... you know, nine months pregnant and carrying a four year old and a few carry-on bags to boot.
and we made it! we arrived at the door as they were paging "buser? party of three? united airways is looking for the buser party at their gate.". i ran up and let them know we had arrived and that my husband was on his way... and then tried to catch my breath and avoid giving birth at the gate.
...at which point, the lady informed me that we had to get on the plane NOW. apparently a storm was coming in and if they didn't close that door that instant we were not going to be able to take off period. i, like a deer in headlights, slowly made my way to the gate while frantically dialing scott. in my head i thought i could syke her out and lead her to believe that all was well and that we would comply. but... at that moment my hubby was under the neon lights on the million mile long people mover... underground. and if you know anything about being underground, you know that is not a location where you get cellular signals.
his phone was ringing off the hook, i was frantically redialing and the lady was giving me an ultimatum: get on the plane or not, but either way i am closing these doors.
and as she closed the doors this momma began to bawl. now i know that doing so was not in the best interest of e, but this hormonal, preggo, d missing, marathon running momma who can normally keep it together simply lost it. naturally, e followed suit.
cue scott emerging from the neon people mover of doom.
we then found ourselves waiting in lines, getting on standby, waiting in more lines, playing the "preggers moving to california" card (with no positive result), waiting, waiting, finally getting e a proper dinner, waiting and then getting back into the car to go home because we had officially run out of options. somewhere in the middle of this ordeal, scott called another airline and booked three tickets on another airline at another airport for early the next morning. oh, and i forgot to mention, our bag that seemed to be such a big issue made it on the first flight to san francisco.
we arrived home at 10:30 pm (we had left the house to drop off d at 3). we had to do laundry as all of e's clean undergarments were in the bag headed to calli. we had to re-pack and we had to leave for the airport at 4 am. we made some calls to our realtor to reschedule our showings. we called the hotel to cancel the first night. we called the car rental place to cancel and re-book.... and we growled at one another. in fact, it was pretty heated and less than attractive.
i declared in that moment that i was not, in fact, going to the airport the next day. at the start of this journey we had felt very clearly that God had said, "walk through one door at a time. no more. no less. don't get ahead of me and try to plan this all out, just have faith in me that i have a plan for you. i'll show it to you one door at a time." for me, missing that flight looked a lot like a closed door. it was quite difficult to walk through the door when the lady closed it right in the face of me and e, thank you very much. after sharing THAT information with scott, i laid down on the couch... to stop the contractions that were coming at regular intervals.
and as i lay there, i felt God gently bringing a calm to my body. i began to sense that all of my emotion was the result of fear and that we did in fact still have a door to walk through... when all of the flights were booked out of o'hare for the remainder of the holiday weekend, somehow, we were able to get three seats on a plane out of midway. it wasn't the plan we had in place, but it was very much an open door.
train me, God, to walk straight, then i'll follow your true path. put me together, one heart and mind; then, undivided, i'll worship in joyful fear. from the bottom of my heart i thank you, dear Lord; i've never kept secret what you're up to. you've always been great toward me- what love! you snatched me from the brink of disaster! God, these bullies have reared their heads! a gang of thugs is after me- and they don't care a thing about you. but you, o God, are both tender and kind, not easily angered, immense in love, and you never, never quit. so look me in the eye and show kindness, give your servant the strength to go on, save your dear, dear child! make a show of how much you love me so the bullies who hate me will stand there slack-jawed, as you, God, gently and powerfully put me back on my feet (psalm 86: 11-17 the message).
and so i got up, i resumed packing, went to bed and got up the next morning to head to the airport. i did this with a somewhat reluctant heart, but with each step, i felt God pushing me onward. and with each nudge, my heart began to soften. and with each softening, i began to truly embrace this particular open door.
our plane landed and we were greeted by the california sun. and that sun warmed me in a way that felt like the Holy Spirit was reaching down and hugging me.
every part of our trip was pretty sucky. we had to pick up our luggage at another airport, scott had a work function on our first night, e lost her dinner at the table as she and i ate together alone in a sidewalk cafe of downtown pleasanton... all over herself and me, every house we looked at made me want to cry with its ugliness, the three that were slightly palatable had offers on them before we reached the ground back in chicago... and our house hadn't even sold yet.
but i can tell you, that weekend marked a change in our journey. it brought a calm to my soul and a reassurance that we should just keep walking forward
one
step
at
a
time.
to be cont'd...
not much to look at from the wrapper? well, let me fill you in on the ever so awesome details. my friends at preserve (a company that was birthed to help preserve the planet... hence the name) has a deal with stonyfield farms (the yogurt guys) and they also have a recycling bin deal with whole foods locations nation wide where they collect #5 plastics. they then take their collection of #5's and melt them down to make a slew of products. the newest one... the preserve toothbrush that sells for $2.55. well, what's so special about that, one might ask? the little toothbrush comes in a postage paid mailer that allows you to ship your used toothbrush back to the good folks at preserve, where they take your handy dandy #5 and melt it down again into a new toothbrush. pure genius!
not only is it less expensive than the reach i typically buy, but it's a fresh approach to recycling. by keeping the #5's together you run less of a risk of contamination (yes, lots of stuff that you put in your curb side bin never makes it to the recycling process because of the folks that may be a little bit less aware of what is in fact recyclable). while giving a recycled product (#5 yogurt cups and the like) a second life, it goes one step further. it gives it a third, fourth, fifth... life. 
