Tuesday, August 20, 2013

it's just you and me kid

a few months back pops and i were sitting at the kitchen table together chatting.  the rest of our crazy clan was not around and it was just penelope and i.  at the end of our chat she looked up at me and said, "it's just you and me kid."  she hopped down from her chair and she gave me a little squeeze.  and then she skipped out of the room with her little pony tail bobbing behind her.

it is one of those "click" moments where you try and carve it into your brain and hold onto the memory forever.

i have no idea where the wee one heard those words.  i had never said it to her that i can recall.  i don't remember anyone saying it to her.  but certainly, she picked it up somewhere and stored it in her head.  and then she pulled it out at a moment that was perfect.

since that day, when she and i are together and alone (which happens very rarely), i say it back to her.

"pops, it's just you and me kid!"

and she giggles and repeats it and snuggles up for a moment as if to savor the moment of alone time with momma.  as my third, she knows that this is rare and special.

this past weekend, the hubs took the e and d on a saturday rafting trip for y princesses.  p and i were to hang back at home.  a few days before the trip i told pops about it.  i told her that it was going to be her special day and that she could choose anything she wanted to do with me and that she would have me all to herself.

we snuggled in my bed and brainstormed ideas about what we might do.  after much debate (and me trying to throw out some grand offers), she landed on frozen yogurt.  that's it.  that's all.  nothing more.  the kid wanted ice cream. once that negotiation was settled, pops paused and said, "are you sure sisters won't be with us?"

i nodded my head and reassured her that it was just for her.

and then she said, "wahoo!  it's going to be 'just you and me kid' day!"  and she bopped off of the bed to go tell her sisters.

it made me giggle.  the intersection of wanting alone time with me and yet choosing to share it with the two she is desperate to be away from immediately.  the need and the love for her sisters and yet the need for me...  without them.

and so saturday arrived two sleeps later (those are preschool time measures, if you didn't know) and we went off on our day together.

the first thing she asked when she surfaced in the morning was if it was time to get yogurt yet.  i told her that we had a few things planned for before the yogurt party.  she was skeptical but eventually succumbed to her momma's plan.

we started out at corner bakery with a little lunch.  together we colored and talked about letters (her choice, not mine).  mid-way through our lunch, she exclaimed, "i can't even believe my sisters are not here!  this day is the best!"

but it is funny how things go.  even though those are the words that came out of her mouth, her actions told a very different story.  she seemed shy and quiet and not quite as "poppy" as she usually is.




but she warmed up as they day went on.  we made a trip to the shoe store and had me all to herself while she selected a new pair of shoes for going back to school.  my pops really likes predictability in her fashion selections.  she finds something comfortable and sticks with it.  like her uggs.  that she wears in july.  or the black velvet cropped jacket...  or the...  you get it!  anyways, in true poppy fashion (pun intended) she selected the exact pair of shoes that she had just outgrown.  she tried them on in the new size, nodded, and wore them out of the store...  happy as a popstar could be.

and then (finally) we made our way to the frozen yogurt shop.  she selected her yogurt and her toppings and made her way to the counter beaming.  it was delicious (the time with the girl AND the yogurt).





as we were leaving the yogurt shop, i asked her if she wanted to get a treat at the berry patch (a quasi toy store).  her eyes lit up and she declared, "this is the best day EVER!"  and so in we went where she carefully selected a plush mermaid doll.  it was fun to watch her pick and to observe the process she went through without having to rush.  we don't get that too often and both of us enjoyed the experience together.  i learned some things about her that i wouldn't have known before.  she is a decisive one when she finds what she wants.  she doesn't get sidetracked by the choices, but is willing to do some looking until she lands on the "right" thing.  once she finds it, she is quick to make a decision.  i didn't know that about her before "you and me kid day".  now i do.  i like that about her and i like that i had the chance to learn it.  you think you "know" your kids.  and then you learn something new and it is pleasant and surprising and pleasant all over again.  

i am thankful for the chance to "know" her in this new way.

and then we headed home.  in the car as we approached our street she seemed sad.  i looked in the rear view mirror and asked her what was wrong.

"you and me kid day is all over and all the fun has ended."

"did you have a good time today?"

"i did but now i am sad."

and then she saw a garage sale at our neighbor's house and she begged me to go.  i was an easy "yes".  she marched up, found a bin of toys and selected a fashion designer kit from the collection.  done.  she looked, she found what she wanted and she executed the decision.

and for $1 she grabbed her kit, her doll and her change and marched in the direction of home.  the smile, now a great big grin.  




it was a good day- one i won't soon forget.  and it was also a good reminder.  "you and me kid" day, should happen more often.  it's good for both of us!



Monday, August 19, 2013

besties

i took a bunch of pictures of pops the other day.  i swear i did.  and in my head i have written an entire post about her.

google did not agree with my post.

technology failed me and refused to import my pictures that support the "in my head written" post.  it made me crazy.  i spent several hours trying to figure it out.  there was another way- but it wasn't the fastest easiest way and it drove me insane that i couldn't figure out technology and master the best avenue for sharing the photos!  (that sentence is all sorts of grammatically incorrect, but i don't care.  it demonstrates my frustration.)

moving on.

when technology DID import photos from phone, this is the one that kept resurfacing: 






literally.  it duplicated itself about 4000 times.  grr.

except.  i can't really feel grr about it.

these are my besties.

they are my "go to" gals.


and nobody can feel "grrr" about their besties.  i mean...  of course there are moments...  but those moments are shadowed by ALL THE OTHER MOMENTS.  these are the girls that "show up" for me.  they watch my girls (or ask their sitters to), they listen to my moaning about this or that, they run with me, they play with me, they engage in projects with me, they shop with me, they loan me stuff, they tolerate my weaknesses and they love me "in spite of" (or at least they pretend to and i am none the wiser).  these are my front line.

they are my girlies (aside from the other three you are tired of hearing about...  e,d, and p).

and of  course, there is always a story.

the story:

i was a-ok with leaving chicago.  but for one component...  my besties.  i could leave a city.  i could leave a house.  i could leave a career.  i could leave just about anything for the sake of following Jesus and seeking adventure...

but my besties?

woah.  that was a hard one.

this picture represents them.  it is missing many (kara, leslie, lindsay, holly, steph, meg, lakita...  and the list goes on), but it does depict the core group of girls that made my life in chicago(proper) rich.

the snap was taken at my going away party- hosted by veronica.  veronica, knowing me well, hosted the best of the best going away par-tays EVER!  i swear....  it was filled with amaze-ball peeps, champagne, lemon meringue treats, creamy cheeses and was NOT a surprise.  she hit all the nails right on the head!

i have fond memories of that night!  it was difficult, for sure!  but it was filled with joy, laughter, fun and kind words from the most amazing people that i miss and think about to this day.



one thing sticks out in my mind from that night, greater than the rest of amazing things....  and it is this:

it wasn't a surprise (i hate surprises!  i really do!  i like to anticipate and plan and look forward to...).  i love that she knew that.  i cherish the fact that i had time to plan and prepare my mind for the evening.

because i planned, i went to hobby lobby and bought my girlies a crystal heart that holds a gem in the center and i tied it with silk sting.  i gave one to each girl pictured above.

and when i gave it to them i told them that i would hang it in my home and think of them and pray for them when i looked at it.

and when i passed them out to the girlies, my besties, brooke suggested a reciprocal agreement.

she suggested that we all do the same...  and that when they looked at their crystal hearts, wherever they were placed, that they might pray for me.

she suggested that they might pray for God to have favor on my new besties...  that He might bring women into my life that would fill me with an abundance of love and closeness.  that they would "know" me and be by my side.

if only brooke could have known!

(a snap from my desk...  can you find my crystal heart?)




and as one can expect, God, the maker of heaven and earth, follows through when we ask for things in His name!

He is good.  He is righteous.  He cares for us.  and He meets (and exceeds) our expectations.

my california besties rock.

i could tell you a story about each of them...  i could.  but it would never do justice to the place that each of them holds in my heart.

the best part of each of them, for me, is that i know they are a part of my life because of an answer to prayer.  they don't necessarily pray.  but a few girls from a few years back do and did...  and God heard those prayers.  and He responded.  and they are NOT in my life because of coincidence.  it is intentional and it is because i worship a God who said clearly to me...

"for i know the plans i have for you, tasha.  i have plans to prosper you and plans to give you the future that you hope for."  (jeremiah 29:11)

and that picture doesn't do full justice to the plans God had for me...  it's missing some girlies...  but it represents a God who is in the details and a God who answers prayers.  i don't know why this continues to leave me in awe...  but it always does.

the God who created the UNIVERSE cares about an itty bitty me.  He really, really does!!!



Saturday, August 17, 2013

the not bummer summer

a few summers ago, my girls favorite movie was judy moody and the NOT bummer summer.  ever since then, we have followed suit with judy and sort of mapped out some things that would be really exciting and adventurous to do over the summer.  and like her, we attach "thrill points" to each activity, in an attempt to accomplish enough points to reach the conclusion that we have had the most epic summer of all time.

i think it is fair to say, this summer genuinely achieves the status of "NOT bummer summer".  i would even go as far as saying that it was truly epic.

that's an incredibly bold and sizable statement, so in keeping up with my trend, the suburban momma will substantiate that statement.  you get to be the judge.

if you follow suburban momma, you know that e went surfing for the first time last summer in coronado.  you also know that she LOVED it. 


 in fact, she enjoyed her first wave catching experience so much that she has talked about little else for the better part of the past year.  we aren't much of a vacation repeat family, but because of our thrilling summer last year, we decided that a repeat trip to coronado was in order.

another well known fact of those that read this blog (or follow me on Facebook) is that my hubs showed my girls the movie soul surfer a few months back following a read of this book...



shortly after watching the movie, my girls began "surfing" on boogie boards in the yard.  the front yard.  often.  very often.  with their left arm tucked into their shirts as if it had been bitten off by a shark.

it was a little bit embarrassing and a whole lot of adorable.  i was hired to be the announcer of the big competition.  and then i was fired because apparently i didn't get their names correct and wasn't using the proper surfing terms.  

and then there is the morning they woke me up out of a sound slumber to beg me to allow them to do this:


they even told every single solid detail about the life of bethany hamilton to a face painter at the hubbies family work event in an effort to explain what they desired to be created on their cheek.  this further resulted in a lot of people raising their eyebrows and looking at me funny.  followed by the question... "i thought she was delaney/ellie".  



this surfing and bethany thing became a wee bit of an obsession, one might say.

you may also recall that e began emailing this past spring for the first time.  the first email she sent was to bethany hamilton (the surfer from the movie who survived the shark attack).  the first email she received was from the bethany hamilton fan club.

in addition (as if all of that isn't enough), a few weeks back i was feeling annoyed at something that was challenging for me to do.  i don't remember the full details, but i was struggling with something physical and e was sitting by watching me.  after a few minutes (and her sensing that momma was having a difficult time), e looked at me and said, "mom, bethany always says something that might help you.  do you want to hear it?"

of course!

"bethany says, 'i don't need easy.  i just need possible'".

it was in that moment that i saw this obsession with new eyes.  here is my girl, all 8 years of her, falling in love with something (and someone) for the first time.  she's never been a fan of much for too long.  but here she is...  choosing someone so inspirational.  i hugged her and thanked her for sharing that quote with me (and secretly wiped the tear out of my eye as i realized that i have much to learn from my ever so wise eight year old).

if you add up all of this, well, we just knew we had to indulge and nurture this obsession.  it is a good one- physical and spiritual in nature, as well as one forming a familial bond.  i'm all in.

somewhere along the way with this bethany obsession we discovered that her board (from the shark attack) and some other cool things were located about an hour north of our coronado vacation destination.  in an effort to nurture their craze, we decided to surprise them with a road trip stop on our way to vacation.

and so we did.






and when we got out of the car scott shot me a look and silently directed me to read a poster on the window.

the poster indicated that bethany was going to be competing in a surf competition that very weekend at that very beach.  oh, really?  you don't say!

we went into the museum and did the museum thing.  the girls were less enthusiastic by the historical display of surfboards  from over the ages and overly enthusiastic with bethany's board.  e just kept examining it with disbelief.  next to the board was a television screen that appeared to not be working.  e asked me to get the museum curator to see what was supposed to be on the screen.  he came over and started to crank things up.  apparently he had been the surf expert in hollywood for the making of the movie.  he began chatting with me while he started the video.  apparently, hollywood had to dilute some of the facts for the movie because bethany's story is even too unbelievable for hollywood.  e became engrossed in the movie and i continued to chat with the expert.  we chatted about the competition and he told me not to waste my time- you can't see much from the beach and the crowds are typically huge.  and then he told me about hansen's.

bethany was going to be doing a signing at the surf shop to promote her new cobian sandals.  1 hour.  huge crowds.  but a chance to meet bethany.  "chance" being the word that i wasn't sure of.

scott and i kept this little tidbit a secret and discussed it that night after the girls went to bed.  did we really want to spend a day of vacation back in the car for a chance that the girls might meet bethany?  what if it didn't work out?  would it ruin the vacay?  i imagined the crying that would ensue...  and it almost stopped me right then and there.

but then we started to recall some of the facts from the video clip that we saw in the surf museum...

according to bethany, she and her mom had started praying for God's will in her life to be revealed just a short time before the shark attack.  and after the attack, she didn't walk away thinking God had failed her.  she KNEW it was the exact opposite.  she knew that this was the answer to that prayer.  she declares that her shark attack has allowed her an opportunity to share God with more people than she ever could have had the attack not happened.  and she's right.  God doesn't fail us and He boldly answered her prayer and gave her opportunity to share His light with the world.

and how could i not foster that love affair for my e?  how could i not help her embrace praying for God's will?  how could i not show her that obstacles can be overcome with God?  how could i not help her develop a belief that challenges are really just opportunities in disguise?

and so we hopped back into the car a few days post museum tour to visit hansens surf shop in hopes of seeing bethany.  when we arrived the line was already wrapped half way around the building.


we hunkered down in line and waited with the mass of people.  scott took the girls to the beach for a bit and then on one on one dates to a nearby ice cream shop.  and we waited.  and waited.  and chatted with our line neighbors...  and then...  after several hours bethany arrived.  the line began move (ever so slowly) and an excitement began to build in the girls.  and eventually our turn came and the girls were face to face with bethany.


it doesn't get much more thrilling or epic than that!  they were in awe.  d was obsessed with her outfit and her smile and her sparkling eyes (seriously- she has the kindest eyes...  even after an hour of poster signing!)  and e was just obsessed.  with everything.


and then we went back to our regularly scheduled vacation of being beach bums.  d caught her first wave with the help of her daddy.



and e attended surf camp and rode the waves for the better part of a week.  she was non-stop.  over and over hopping up on her board and perfecting the balancing act.  


p stayed a little bit closer to shore and hung with momma on the beach.  we collected shells and cheered on our crazy surfing family together.





and the older two continued to tuck in their left arm from the sleeves of their clothing.  e wore a dress three times (!) and p wore her velvet winter jacket...  because it is her favorite.  and because she is p.




and then we distributed thrill points.  this momma came to the conclusion that a week on the beach, catching first waves and their 100th wave, and spending time as a family, and ice cream dates with daddy, and meeting bethany = infinity thrill points.  

it was truly a NOT bummer summer.