once upon a time...

...there was a baby girl named delaney. she brought joy into her momma's world (and her daddy's, and her big sister's, and her baby sister's, and...)

today i'm going to share a little more about that joy filled girl:
yesterday d saw the bumbo chair on the floor and devised a plan. she climbed up onto a chair and placed the bumbo on the table and then put herself on the table into the bumbo chair- a girl with a plan. she then called out, "look it, momma! look it!" it was in that moment that i think it hit me- here is my second born celebrating her second birthday. so often i think of her as older- well, because she acts older. she wants to be older. but the truth is, d sitting in that chair isn't so far off. she is still a baby. just because we have another baby, doesn't mean that she is no longer a baby.

d had a great birthday. we opened some gifts in the morning and then went to a fun place in town (along the same vein as chuck-e-cheese) to play some games and get the wiggles out, and then had cake and ice cream. in the morning we asked her whose birthday it was. her reply... "baby Jesus!"... "no buggy, it's your birthday today!".... her eyes lit up and she was thrilled.

d is obsessed with band aids. i made the mistake of putting the first-aid bin under the sink in my bathroom, rather than above in the medicine cabinet. d noticed my mistake almost immediately and has since decided to put band aids just about everywhere. bump into something... get a band aid! need to fasten something together... get a band aid! something is broken... get a band aid! her most recent use has been for her sweet baby sister. i'm not sure what she was trying to accomplish, but p recently was adorned with a dora on the head. she didn't seem to mind and d was thrilled with her work.

so, the week before Christmas we jumped in with two feet (wearing sparkley two-inch platform flip-flops) to this potty training thing. d decided on sunday morning that she was NOT going to wear a diaper and that she would go on the big girl potty. after a couple rounds of success i broke out the potty patty* stash i had hidden in my closet and decided to embrace the inevitable. my girl, one week shy of 2 had decided she was ready. and who was i to stand in her way?

we dressed for the occasion. she donned a pair of potty patty's*, baby legs, and a tee to inspire her (nothing like an inspirational message to set the stage)!

and let me tell you, day one was a huge success! if being a great success means living in the bathroom, using gobs of toilet paper and hearing lots of "i do, i do". and just as quickly as we started, we stopped because this momma realized that the week before Christmas, the month before Scott's study schedule goes crazy, and two months before the bar exam is not the best time to potty train, thank you very much.

***potty patty is a brand of undies that help in the potty training process. they rock.

below is a clip of d on Christmas afternoon. for a few moments, she was allowed to play uninterrupted with e's coveted barbies. apparently, she had been listening intently to her sister and the dolls all day because she jumped into singing the song without missing a beat.

buggy

my baby bug is two today. as all momma's of young babes say, it is difficult to imagine where the time went and how we got to two. it has flown by. last year i told you the story of sweet d's birth, if you missed it you can check it out now. she was my easy one. for the first year of her little life, she continued to be my easy babe. she was compliant, calm and followed a relaxed schedule. we were in baby bliss.

now, as she turns two, i have a very different description of my d. compliant? not so much. her favorite things are "i do", "laney's",and "no, this way". she marches to the beat of her own drum. that girl also knows what she wants and the path she plans on taking to getting it done. she is as independent as they come, she plays hard and then sleeps hard but she also has the most sincere tender side, too. often, she'll come in for a snuggle or walk up to me out of the blue and say "love you, momma". she is generous and internally provoked to say things like, "thank you" and "you k?".

her newest trait is working the system. if she does something she knows she isn't supposed to do and you ask her a question about it... well here, let me give a few examples...

as we entertained company last night, the television suddenly came on.

example 1

scott: laney, how did the tv turn on?

laney: i don't know. (shoulders shrugged, laid back, "not me" written all over her face, remote in hand)

example 2

laney: momma, book broken (as she offers up one of our special Christmas books in one hand and slivers of pages in the other)

me: laney, how did that happen?

laney: i don't know

shy on personality? not so much! that girl is about as unique as they come. she has a way on putting her "d" stamp on everything she touches and twisting it to be her very own. and that girl can work a room. she can get a laugh whenever she wants.

she has a reputation at e's school, and at church, and at playgroup... and at... you get the point.

and we wouldn't have her any other way.

happy birthday little girl, your momma and daddy love you so much.

ho, ho, ho

before i even get into this post, i am going to throw out a few things-

first: i respect every body's right to choose what they think is best for their family. i also think that every family is different and that there isn't a one size fits all approach to parenting.

second: i think that as we raise our babies, we change. what i thought was right yesterday might not be the same as what i'll think is right tomorrow. this parenting thing is a journey and hopefully when my babies are grown i'll be older and wiser than i am today.

ok, so with all of that out of the way, i'm going to attempt to answer a question that scott and i have been asked routinely over the years. my answer isn't "right" it simply happens to be our best attempt at "right" right now.

the question: why don't you incorporate santa into your celebration of Christmas?

when e was still in my belly scott and i began the difficult task of deciding how we would parent. we opened up the discussion of a certain mr. santa claus and came to the conclusion that we didn't think we wanted him to be a part of our Christmas celebration. sure, both scott and i grew up believing in the man in the man in the red suit. we wrote our list each year, we looked for the reindeer in the sky, and we left our warm cookies and milk. it didn't scar either one of us. but after some serious thought, we both concluded that it didn't make Christmas better for us either.

here's the thing. we desire(d) for Christmas to be what it was intended for. we want it to mark the day that our Lord made a great sacrifice and took on flesh to become man. it was done in such a beautiful way- through a baby, so that earthly minds could wrap their heads around "love".

and the question is, can you do that while incorporating santa? yeah, i think you can. i firmly believe that you can have santa and Jesus and not loose the meaning of the celebration. my mom did it. santa gave us gifts, we had a birthday cake for Jesus and i definitely understood why we were celebrating. it didn't get lost on me...

then.

you see, it is later that i worry about, long after we are done believing that elves are running a toy shop on the north pole. santa and Jesus have a lot in common. they are both "unseen". they both come from a place that our human minds can't quite understand. they both require a lot of faith to believe in.

let me concoct a little scenario here. somewhere down the road all kids stop believing in santa claus. at that point, santa and Jesus are very intertwined. when you stop believing in st. nick there is an element of disappointment that enters all kids minds. it's only natural. so let's say that e reaches her point of truth: the man in the red suit is a sham. she moves on and continues to celebrate the season. somewhere down the line, years later, she's going to have to sort out her other beliefs. she's going to have to spend some time wrestling with God. and on her own, she's going to have to decide if she believes in Him.

as she does this, is there a chance that the intertwined initial experience of the "unseen" and "faith" and the mystery of what our human minds can't totally wrap themselves around become clouded? is there a chance that her disappointment in the santa dude somehow impacts her ability to grasp the truth of a saviour sent to the world as an infant? is it possible that because one is a lie, the other begins to feel suspicious too?

i don't know. each person wrestles with belief differently. but if there is a chance (even a teeny tiny chance) that the fairy tale of santa begins to cloud the truth of a risen saviour, then that's a chance that i'm not willing to take.

you see, my ultimate goal is train her in the way that she will go with the hope that she will not depart from it. i long for my baby girl (s) to seek a relationship with Father God and i don't want to get in the way of that.

santa is cool. he's fun. he makes little kids attempt to behave better during the holiday season. but what he doesn't do is point them to Christ.

and so as for me and my family, we decided to just leave him out of it all together (along with that bunny that hops along dolling out treats in baskets). my kids still love Christmas. they adore Easter. and so far, it hasn't had any form of negative impact on their lives.

and as i said, this is our answer. yours may look differently and that is wonderful. what isn't wonderful though is going through the motions without thinking it through. ans so here is my challenge... you knew this coming, right?

i challenge you and yours to be intentional about what you do. embrace whatever traditions that you think are good and don't let anyone else impose their judgment upon what you decide. and then pray. pray that God will make His birth and His death meaningful in the lives of your babies. pray that they will seek Him. pray that you will have the tools to equip them. and pray that they will embark on a life journey with Him.

and then live it out. openly show them what your relationship with the Father looks like. own your mistakes (man, i have to do this a lot) and share your encounters with the Living God.

***oh, and as an aside, a friend of mine gave me the best way to equip your non-santa believing kiddos refrain from dispelling the myth for their friends... we tell them who st. nick was, and then tell them that if they want to "pretend to believe" they can. the funny thing is, they love being in the know. sure, they wanted to sit on the dude's lap at playgroup and at a holiday party we attended, but they loved whispering to scott and i that they knew he wasn't real. it actually made e feel special to "in the know" about the guy that she doesn't really understand anyway. (she's spent a lot of time trying to picture reindeer flying. smile.) it also all happens to be true- which is important to me in my relationship with my girls.

do you like it?

"i like it, momma! i like it! buggy lick the beaters?"

the bees knees

i mean seriously, have you ever seen a more adorable dimpled knee?

and check out those kankles!

the gift that kept on giving

back in october i was the winner of the mops door prize. i was rather jazzed to be the recipient of a $50 gift certificate to a local spa. i can't think of a better way to try and remain relaxed during this hectic season of our lives (remember that we are in the middle of this?)! and so this week, off to the spa i went. i usually am all about the massage, but this time i decided to spice it up a little. i went for the caribbean hydrating something-or-other... basically they sand papered me down with scratchy gloves and then applied a crazy seaweed masque and super moisturizing lotion treatment. (it was great, but next time i'm sticking with the massage. no need to switch up an already good thing.)

man, my stories are long. i drive myself crazy- kudos to ya'll for sticking with me here.

at the end of the treatment the gal gave me a gift bag (and a $10 gift card to come again and a $10 gift card for referring scott to get a haircut there... all for redeeming my prize???) anyways, gift bags always leave me feeling unsettled. on one hand, i love to get free stuff. on the other hand, i feel like it is pretty stinkin' wasteful. half of the time you open the bag to discover a lipstick color that was popular in 1986, a sample of shampoo for someone with thin hair (when i have thick), a curling pomade (when i already have naturally curly hair)... you get the picture. it usually end up to be a whole lotta waste. and then it makes me feel bad for being wasteful. so what started out as a free bag jackpot easily turns into a guilt evoking pile of junk that you now have to try to get rid of.

ahhh, but my dear friends at aveda, they totally figured it out. when i arrived home and examined my prize, well, i was in free bag jackpot heaven! thank you aveda. kudos to you and your little gift. i will use it for years to come.

check it out! what you see above is a travel bag (made out of recycled materials). it contains 4 refillable bottles (perfectly sized for my friends at the tsa), one fillable tub and one spray bottle. it also contains stickers to label your bottles. when you remove the green cardboard sleeve (the one above that says fill-ables) the backside contains all sorts of earth friendly travel tips.

hooray aveda! you seem to be one of the few companies out there in touch with the wants/needs of your consumer and are trying to be innovative in how you are doing things.

i'd also like to point out that while aveda products don't eliminate all of the ingredients that i try to avoid, it is the only salon product that i have found that eliminates most of the ingredients that i try to avoid. for me, that is huge!

intoxicating

i just can't get enough of this girl. her giggle makes my heart swell (and it helps me forget that i am suddenly getting up to feed her 3-4 times each night). what can i say, her dimples and her sweet laugh are good for this momma's soul... and it seems like her big sister likes it too!

and i can't promise that i won't post 100 more "poppy giggling" videos. i like 'em that much!

* note, to view this you need to go to the actual blog address and have to pause the music player on the bottom right. happy viewing.

favorites

ok, so my last post was centered around a song... and it got me thinking. (see, i told you i was impacted by music!)

when i was a little girl we went to church at grace chapel in skanetlas, ny. every Christmas they had the usual children's performance. you know, the one where one kid got to be mary, one got to be joseph and a bunch of others had to be things like sheep? it was always so much fun. i'm sure i was in it more than once, but i only remember being an angel one year. at the end of the performance our pastor's eldest daughter would sing the gift goes on by sandy patti. all of us kids would gather around her feet on stage and join her in singing the chorus. i can remember it as if it were yesterday. i loved it. she had such a pretty voice and i longed to be her one day, singing the lead with a group of kids at my feet joining me in the chorus. (that little dream didn't take into account that i can't sing and have a pretty terrible voice, but a girl can dream can't she?)

anywho, to date, it is my favorite Christmas song. (second runner up is i believe in santa claus by kenny rogers and dolly parton, if you must know!)

what's your favorite Christmas song?

lonely

the depth of your dreams, the height of your wishes
the length of your vision to see, the hope of your heart
is much bigger than this
for it's made out of what might be

now picture your hope- your hearts desire
as a castle that you must keep
in all of its splendor, it's drafty with lonely
this heart is too hard to heat

when i get lonely, well, it's only a sign
some room is empty and that room is there by design
if i feel hollow, it's my proof that there's more
for me to follow. that's what the lonely is for.

is it a curse or a blessing this palace of promise
when the empty chill makes you weep
with only the thin fire of romance to warm you
these halls are too tall and deep

but you can seal up the pain, build wall in these hallways
close off a small room to live in
but those walls will remain, and keep you there always
and you'll never know why you were given... why you were given the lonely

some room is empty
if i feel hollow, it's just my proof that there's more
for me to follow, that's what the lonely is for

from the depth of your dreams, to the height of your wishes
the length of your vision to see, the hope of your heart is much
bigger than this
for it's made out of what might be


this amazing folk singer came to my high school way back when. i fell in love with his lyrics. if you've been following my blog for a while then it should come as no surprise for me to say that i am deeply impacted by music. it is often the compass of my heart. sometimes a song will tap into emotions that linger under the surface and cause those emotions to stir me.

this week has been a hard one for me. nothing to note has happened, it's just that the lonely has kind of settled in. i guess that is bound to happen given the circumstances. but it took me off guard.

a sadness has swirled around me and i long to click my heels and be back in my home on the range (you know, the one in la grange).

and then i was listening to my itunes and this song came up on the play list. i haven't listened to it in a while. it's by that folksy guy that came to my high school, the same guy i saw in a small concert with some of my favorite friends last fall in chicago, david wilcox. when i first heard it, it didn't resonate with me at all. but for some reason, i downloaded it and added it to my play list.

that "some reason" turns out to be today.

so as i sit here lonely, wondering why in the world we left it all behind, i find these lyrics resting peacefully on my heart.

i have no desire to ever "close off a small room to live in". so today, i'm going to rest in the fact that "some room is empty and it's there by design" (hmm.. sweet Jesus, reveal that empty room to me) and i'm going to let it be my "proof that there's more for me to follow" (HIM).

you see, we didn't end up here on a whim. this process was one that was deeply routed in prayer. with each step, God whispered to us to walk through the next open door. He never promised us anything. He just kept telling us to take the next steps. i know i've written about all of this before, but it is a good reminder to this lonely heart that God brought us here for His plan. and that the lonely will guide me so long as i don't linger in the lonely and so long as i cling to Him. because, let' face it, He has a much greater "vision to see".

underneath the mistletoe last night

a few years ago i was on the phone with my sister when she discovered that my nephew had rolled all the way across the room and under a chest. we laughed and then this first time mom questioned how that could happen, ya know, if she was "watching" him. (i'd yet to experience a roller.)

today, i learned how it happens... man those rollers are fast! while on the phone (with my sister) i discovered poppy... apparently she has the whole mistletoe thing a little confused. she rolled completely across the family room, right up to the tree and was smooching with an ornament.

oh, and had drool dripping off her chin. and i must admit, i thought she was so scrumptious that i had to go in for a smooch myself. yep, with drool and all.

got milk?

i've never really wanted to know much about where my food comes from. ever since my short stint as a vegetarian in high school, i have been pretty sure that if i looked into i'd probably have issues with being a carnivore. ignorance is bliss, right?

a few weekends ago i finally sat down and watched food inc.. wow! if you haven't seen it... i am not even sure i would recommend it (i mean- rent it now). it did exactly what i thought it would. it confirmed all the reasons that i am suspicious of mainstream grocery stores, it supported why i care so much about eating organic, and it created a whole new heap of problems for me. it also made me start to have some serious questions about fellow consumers.


i made it a point to speak to the butcher in several of the "mainstream" grocery stores that i have been checking out. it was interesting! the overall conclusion was that they have tried to sell more organic beef, chicken, pork, etc but that it doesn't sell. more than one butcher said that it is too expensive and that the average consumer isn't interested.


isn't interested? after i picked my jaw up off of the floor i gave some serious thought to that. in the middle of a health care crisis nationwide, we consumers, ought to make it our business to be more interested. we are only hurting ourselves if we don't make it our business to connect the dots between what the animals we eat ingests and our own personal health. it is a scary thought to realize that "the average consumer" (assuming the butcher is right with his analysis) doesn't care about this.


a few weeks ago, our family visited some local relatives up near sacramento (i should insert that we had an awesome time and that they were way generous and made our crazy family feel very much at home). across the street from their house is a dairy farm. ahhh... the heart of america.


when i think of a dairy farm, my mental picture and reality aren't really in sinc. and while it was fun for the kids to see the cows, it made this momma kind of insane. the cows were packed into small fenced in "cages" if you will. there wasn't a blade of grass in sight. in fact, the bottom of the area was covered in cow dung. no joke, they were standing ankle deep in their own feces and the feces of their cell mates. it was foul.

it even made the kids a little bit uncomfortable.

as it should. we should all be uncomfortable that the food we eat is raised in such filth. we should also be uncomfortable with the fact that our food is pumped with corn, antibiotics and junk to fatten it up. and once again, we should connect the dots. is it any wonder that we are becoming more and more resistant to antibiotics?

so many people that i know say that they can't afford to eat organic foods. and while i recognize the huge impact that eating organic has on the family budget, and while i am not here to judge your personal values, i wish more people would think about the challenges that we face if we don't start "voting with our dollars". i believe that if more and more people rejected the "food" that is offered to us in our local groceries, we would begin to see a shift in the way that farmers farm.

i hate blogging about such political topics, but in this climate (where health care is about to change in a dramatic way) i believe we can't afford to not address this issue. certainly, what we eat and the health of our bodies are very much connected.

and i'm not even addressing the cruelty factor...

seriously, this just isn't right? now, every time i see a glass of milk my mind is flooded by the image of cow dung. i know that it isn't in the milk, but isn't there a better way? won't you join me in making it our business to care where our food comes from?

hurry, hurry call the fireman...

i've been thinking a great deal lately about advent. up until this year, we haven't really done anything to conceptualize Christmas into the expanding mind of our five and almost two year old. sure, we sing Christmas carols, we talk about baby Jesus, we deck the halls, we go to church, and we don't focus on the big man in the red suit. but i think there is so much more to do.


i've just had some trouble getting started. and i want it to be special... i want to capture the beauty of Father God sending His Son into the world to be flesh. i want to make real meaning out of the sacrifice that He gave us. i want it to linger in their minds for months to come, so that when we celebrate the Son of God dying for our sins in a few months from now, they cling to how HUGE that is.

and so this year i am being more intentional. we set out advent candles... that have been questioned by several visitors into our home. we have 8, not 4. it looks a little strange, but i decided that i couldn't deal with the fighting that would ensue so i gave each girl their own set. every sunday evening the girls light their candles and then sit on the couch. they listen to the message version of the Christmas story (a cd given to them by a friend of mine last Christmas). ellie reads along in the book and d bops around causing mischief. she usually grabs a doll out of the toy bin and says, "baby Jesus, momma!" e is getting really good with the book- she is identifying words that she knows and is intent on knowing when to turn the page without any help.

at the end of the book we sing a few Christmas songs. the girls don't really know the words, and truth be told are just plain old ready for bed. at the end of the weekend it is usually a chaotic experience. after they sing, they blow out their candles. this weekend, while blowing out her candles, d lit her hair on fire. e thought that her sister with crispy fried strands of baby fine hair was a huge hoot (as did her momma and daddy). by the end of it, each week, scott and i are ready for our girlies to be in bed.

i've given some thought about throwing in the towel and trying again when they are older, but i think that is way off track. you see, although they are little, it is sinking in. we are starting traditions that route this holiday in Christ. and that is what it is about.

in a chat about santa this week with e's teacher she made an interesting statement... when i told her we didn't really emphasize santa she said, "are you Christian?" why yes, we are. however, last time i checked Jesus was the reason we celebrate CHRISTmas. santa was just a guy that came along several hundred years later (in a european country that is disputed) and was a generous dude. he just didn't happen to be the Son of God, born to a virgin, to bring God's love to the world in flesh, to save us from our sins, to offer us eternal life... (i didn't say all of that, in those words) but was a little taken aback.

and so we are going to continue our new advent ritual and i'm already thinking about new things that i can add next year. because for me, it is pretty important that my girls get the right message about this season.

any suggestions? you all sure are a quiet bunch of readers, but i'm pretty sure you have pretty wonderful ideas. do share!

train up a child in the way he should go, and he will not depart from it. (proverbs 22:6)

anyone for hummus?

don't mind if "i do"...

smitten

a year ago at this exact time, i couldn't imagine life with a third baby. now, i can't imagine life without her. poppy has captured my heart.

somehow (yet again) i missed her 4 month "birthday". and so here, just a few weeks late is an update on our little penelope.



at 4 months: you have woken up! you are no longer a sleepy infant. you have three naps throughout the day and spend the rest of your time giggling at your momma and daddy, staring in awe at big sister ellie, and trying your hardest to keep track of big sister delaney. you are beginning to hold onto toys, but can drop them and forget about them in an instant. you spend a lot of your day rolling onto your tummy and yes... you have found your toes.

you hold onto them a lot, but are sometimes just as happy to hold onto the cuff of your pants. your not picky! you'll take either.

at nighttime we have made some big changes. you are now sleeping in your own room in your own bed. you go to bed at 8pm and you sleep for 3-4 hour stretches. mommy is a little tired, but you are much more well rested now that you are out of the moses basket and into your own digs. secretly, mommy misses having you right next to my bed. i liked to gaze at you sleeping and i also liked sleeping with you in my arms (but my arms were getting really sore and you were waking up way too easily). we're both better off with our new arrangement.

in month three you survived swine flu. it was a little scary for mommy and daddy. you had a high fever and a pretty bad cough. we wished we could make things easier on you, but since you are so little there wasn't much we could do except keep a close watch on you. each day we had to give you saline- you did not like that too much. the best way to help keep you comfortable was to hold you and give your legs little massages. you really enjoyed that and it helped you relax. we were so thankful that you were only sick for a few days and you recovered without any problems.

in month three you also decided to reject the bottle. mommy was so happy that you would take it so easily when you were younger, but just as easily as you took it- you rejected it. currently you are on strike.

we all love you so much little poppy. ellie is especially delighted by you. she lays in bed with momma in the morning while i feed you. she strokes the back of your head and you "talk" to her after you eat. daddy has been getting full belly giggles from you these days. he likes to hold you in front of the mirror and you laugh your head off at the sight of yourself and your daddy in the mirror. mommy wishes that she could stop time. i know that watching you grow will be delightful, but right now, i want to stop the clock and just keep you little for as long as i can. what can i say, i'm smitten.

pinks my favorite color

watch this!

i saw this recently and think it is a pretty good reminder based on "new" (bunk) recommendations.

i had my scare last summer. i have a friend of a friend going through chemo/radiation as we speak. i have a friend who lost their mother. i have an aunt who lives to tell about it. maybe cautious isn't such a bad idea after all, eh?

blessed with injustice?

last sunday our church cancelled the service. yep. you read that right. they canceled church and instead of worshiping in the sanctuary in the traditional format, we worshiped by serving the community. they set up tons of different service projects and each individual chose how they wanted to spend their time serving the community. this clearly took weeks and weeks to organize. as soon as i heard about it i began to feel very much at home in our new church. it reminded me of my days in the city and being part of a church that desired to look more like the image of Jesus than the image of the local country club.

this sunday was a celebration sunday. the music was phenomenal, the stories and pictures shared were moving and it left you with an overall "warm fuzzy" feeling to seek out more ways in which we can serve our community on a regular basis... you know, without the big production of canceling church. i'm not sure how that translates for me, but i know it must translate.

at the end of the service, our pastor shared the following prayer with us. man, does this sum up a really beautiful (and yet very uncomfortable) way to live! after hearing it on sunday, i haven't been able to get it out of my head. and so of course, i thought i'd share:

franciscan prayer:
may God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half truths, and superficial relationships, so that you may live deep within your heart.

may God bless you with anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people, so that you may work for justice, freedom, and peace.

may God bless you with tears to shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, starvation and war, so that you may reach out your hand to comfort them, and turn their pain into joy.

and may God bless you with enough foolishness to believe that you can make a difference in this world, so that you can do what others claim cannot be done.

amen

pretty good stuff, huh? can we pray like that? do we dare ask Jesus to make our lives a little bit uncomfortable? i think some powerful stuff could happen in our world, and more importantly, in our hearts if we were to dare to ask to be blessed in this way.

remembering amish country

you may remember me blogging last year about my chicago girls. the photo that i used in that entry was taken last november. the four of us, in an effort to celebrate janet's pregnancy with dot, took a little 24 hour trip to amish country (shipshewana, in). we spent our time there browsing the quaint little shops, admiring the craftsmanship that the amish bring to anything they touch, watching their chirstmas kick-off parade, gabbing like school girls in our bed-and-breakfast 4 bed dorm room, and just enjoying one another. it was wonderful. we went to give janet a little respite before dot entered the scene, but each ended up getting out own little respite, too.

while there, i found this little frame. it struck me as adorable and funny and attention grabbing. i thought it would be a great addition to our holiday decorations.

yesterday, we decorated our house for christmas. it was lovely. we trimmed the tree, found new spots for all of our usual holiday decorations, listened to festive music... and it was 74 and sunny. now that is my idea of wonderful! but when i reached into the bin and pulled out that little frame...

i smiled first. but then a little sadness crept into my heart. i love our life here. i still find myself laughing sometimes that i live in california. (i'm not sure why i find it so funny, but it certainly isn't something this east coast girl ever expected to be doing.) the sun is amazing, you heard about how i have a new found appreciation for nature and it is mostly good. but i am a social being and a few months ago i said goodbye to some of the most wonderful people in the world. i miss them.

this holiday season, as i look at those little guys tugging that great big tree, i'll think of my fabulous 24 hour get away. and while it might make me sad, i'm going to choose to be grateful. because the truth is, i am so blessed to have those three gals in my life.

love you girls and miss you more than words can express.

setting the bar

my husband received an ominous package in the mail today. it scares the pants off of me. 7 books and an ipod loaded with lectures- rockin' times, i tell you!

dear california bar exam,

you have quite the reputation! i know you are about to take over our lives for the next three months and i simply ask that you be kind to my husband. he works hard and now he is going to be working harder trying to tackle you. please go easy on him, and me for that matter. i'm going to be a single mom for a bit and i anticipate that it will have its challenges. i would be forever thankful if you would give us an easy run at this. we did this together a few years ago, but that was before three bambinos. here's to hoping we can do it again.

sincerely,
momma

tinkle tinkle ellie is a great big star

setting the stage: scott and momma were in the kitchen making dinner, enjoying some wine and snacks, and celebrating the fact that all three of our children were in another room... AWAY for the first time in what feels like decades. suddenly we heard a herd of elephant on the stairs... children approaching.

ellie: buggy went pee pee all by herself on the potty.

delaney: yeah!

m & d: really? (looking at buggy who is dressed completely in a different outfit than when both children went upstairs)

ellie: i put her on the potty and she went pee pee and then i wiped her and then i put her diaper on and she got dressed.

delaney: yeah!

m & d: why is she wearing your pajamas, ellie?

ellie: oh, because she wanted to be a big girl like me.

m & d: oh.

we then proceeded to take buggy's picture, adjust the diaper that was slightly twisted, and hand out high-fives to both girls... you know, because our 5 year old has decided to potty train our baby who isn't quite yet two. and baby under two, seems to respond well to her very involved sister.

FOR HIRE: 5 year old potty trainer, no charge in exchange for room and board (just kidding).

un-american

we had a really nice thanksgiving. we enjoyed yummy appetizers, watched football and played barbies for the better part of the day. then we all got dressed and headed out to dinner.

we took some family pictures, although delaney wasn't really in the mood...

and eventually boycotted the family snapshots. (which should have been an indicator of what was to come as we were about to sit down to dinner.)

poppy got tired from the tryptophan...

ellie ate scrumptious chocolate cake.

and delaney was a lunatic. literally. at one point she was lying on the floor at the base of the buffet saying "i do! i do!". she didn't get to "do" and made us pay for the rest of the meal by trying to escape from our table for the duration of the meal.

and last but not least, momma was in thanksgiving heaven (if there is one).

cue story:

(which i will tell at the risk of letting you think that i might possibly be un-American)

for the better part of my life, i have had a strong aversion to thanksgiving. most of the activities surrounding this day actually cause me to be, how shall i say this, UN-thankful. i'm not typically a huge "woman's rights" kind of girl, but this holiday pushes me strongly in that direction. there is something really unappealing about women slaving for days on end planning the perfect feast. then the day arrives and the average male plops his tush down on the couch to enjoy the game- while the above mentioned women continue to bust a move in the kitchen. first is the round of appetizers, then the dinner, then the dessert, then the dishes, then the post dinner sandwiches, then the post dinner sandwiches dishes... that's a whole lotta UN-thankful for this momma.

i should also mention that the average turkey day menu contains ONE item that this momma really likes. i am a fan of turkey. i am not so much a fan of stuffing, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, green bean casserole, yams... you get the picture. so the idea of doing all of the work for a dinner that i don't care for is less than appealing. it is, for me, UN-thankful inducing.

i am also apposed to the amount of food consumption that this holiday promotes. it isn't natural! it is way too much eating for me to handle.

BUT TODAY... today was thanksgiving heaven! the buffet that we went to had the perfect variety! instead of lots of things that make me feel UN-thankful, this buffet was filled with lots of my favorite things.

and so today, i celebrated MY FIRST gratitude inducing thanksgiving! my belly was delighted by caesar salad, oysters on the half shell, shrimp cocktail, ciabbata rolls and perfectly cooked prime rib.

and i was full of thanks.

P.S.- although not a fan of thanksgiving, i am a huge fan of thankfulness. i try to be that all year long.